Because I have no pride and even less vanity, I will share this gem with you!

Some background:
It was my birthday, and I had purchased a Little Mermaid cake. The kids asked about the movie and I was telling them the story, and for some reason, my brother started talking about my childhood alter-ego, Pencilhead, who had a doozy of a lisp. Somehow the two became one in my head, and I began to sing a song from the Little Mermaid movie (which Caleb used to beg me to sing him every night before bed) with my Pencilhead lisp.

The result? Is FANTASTIC.

The first time I saw it, I was shocked and dismayed at the ridiculousness of it. The second time, I nearly peed laughing. The third, I decided I am a talented entertainer. Whatever your reaction may be, enjoy, because I don't believe I'll leave this up for very long.
LOL!

(I love how I have to wipe the spit off my mouth near the end)

Some kids came to the door to collect cans and bottles this morning, and I ran to get some for them, leaving the door open. Both cats quickly made friends with the curious boys. Here's the conversation we had when I returned to the door with the cans:

Tall boy: what's your cat's name?

Me: (assuming he meant Pumpkin because he was patting her) That's Pumpkin!

Tall boy: ...and your dog?

Me: Dog!?!

Tall boy: (pointing at Elly) well...THAT!

Mark laughed raucously from the basement. Poor Elly. The kid was embarrassed to learn she was a cat, but I think Elly was even more embarrassed.

A good birthday, altogether.
I had a Little Mermaid cake, and Aidan got me a My Little Pony (he picked the one with the birthday hat), and Caleb got me a silver bracelet. Sweethearts. We had my brother Jeff over for dinner and now we're making up his bed after watching Cloverfield (WOO THAT MOVIE ROCKS!).
Mark's Ma called to wish me Happy Birthday, and I got a card from my Mom and my ex Mother in-law (quite touching, doncha think?)
Mark gave me a stuffed penguin, and apparently there's something in the mail for me! Jim gave me Anne Geddes' biography, which is awesome.
I am 33...and it's not so bad.
:)

I now have quite a lot more work.
And the same pay.

More responsibility. Higher profile. It'll look great on a resume.

More stress. Same money.

More stress.

Same money.


Hmmmmmmm.

Not much sleep's been had over here. Aidan puked two nights ago. Last night he just couldn't breathe well.
So today I went back to work after having taken several days off from being sick myself and then taking care of the kids. I was so tired at work I could barely keep my eyes open. My team enjoyed making fun of me during the team meeting this afternoon. So what if I was resting my nose on my pen? So what if I couldn't focus?
Yeesh.
Afterward, my Director came to my desk, sat down, and said, "you're in such a wierd mood today...you were all...(makes strange faces and gestures)". I laughed, and she then asked if I'd been drinking.
*sigh*
I think I'm going to bed early tonight.

OH! THEN she told me she'd made two separate batches of ice cream last weekend in an attempt to make lactose-free ice cream FOR ME!!!!!

And I said:

"Well I appreciate the effort. But now I WANT some."

She said "goodbye", left my office, then turned around and said, "YOU'RE SO DEMANDING!"

Strange day.

I go bed.

Did you know that a Farmer's Market carrot grand cap muffin (you get them at Loblaw's) has 540 calories and 36 grams of fat?
OMG. So the nice, healthy snack I have nearly every morning is actually more fattening than a Big Mac (540 calories and 29 grams of fat)?
This discovery sent me on a frenzied rampage around my kitchen, examining every label I could find. The boston creme cake on my counter, for example (complete with three layers of chocolate cake, cream filling and chocolate icing), has 200 calories per slice, and 7 grams of fat.
I can eat EIGHT Oreo cookies before I reach the calorie and fat content of that muffin.

My world has been turned upside-down.

What to DOOOOOOOO?

Me: Guys have boobs too, you know.
Friend #1: That's true.
Me: Moobs.
Friend #1 and #2 laugh heartily.
Me: Guys can ALSO get breast cancer!
Friend #2: (looking quite taken aback) WHAT?!?
Friend #1: That's also true.
Friend #2: That's gay.

*sigh*

I laughed so hard my face hurt. I would not survive work without these guys, truly.

Happy birthday, girlfriend. You know who you are, you super-hottie!
;)

Me: So, would you like to keep doing this crossword puzzle with me, or would you like to go downstairs and watch tv with your brothers?

Caleb: Mom! It's Easter! Let's CELEBRATE!

Me: (laughing) Okay! You're right! Uh...what does that mean?

Caleb: No tv, no games. Let's spend time TOGETHER.

...I didn't stop smiling for a long time after that...

I worked from home today and as always, got a shitload more work done here than I do at work. Less distractions, I guess. I dunno, but I always get so much done at home. How, then, am I still probably going to miss my deadline for a document I'm supposed to hand in tomorrow?

I'll tell you why: I am busy. Work has never been this crazy for me. It's okay; I like what I'm doing. And it's not like I'm the only one; everyone on my team fluctuates between being really busy and being overwhelmingly busy. My Manager told me yesterday she thinks really highly of me. So, I must be doing something right, I guess.

*smiles*

I'm looking forward to the long weekend. I'm sad I don't have the kids for the weekend, so a little photography trip to Toronto should make me feel much better. And we'll come back for Sunday, just in time to have Jim and the kids over for an Easter egg hunt and turkey dinner.

Then, Monday: day of doing nothing. Maybe some post-processing. And yeah, I should work on some photos for Art in the Park, and get my big print ready and on a cd for the printer.

*sigh*

So much to do...

Here's hoping y'all get some relaxation in. And get some chocolate in, too.

Took the kids to see "Horton Hears a Who" tonight. It was cool. We all enjoyed it. I loved Jim Carrey as Horton.
Guess how much it cost for a small cherry slush and a small kool aid.
Guess!
It was $7.45.
Did your head just pop off? When the guy told me the price, I surprised myself by uttering a quiet, but distinct: "Jesus CHRIST!"

Anyway the movie was worth it. And we don't do it that much, so I'll just suck it up and smile.

:)

I like doing photos of people. I look doing photography in general, yeah, but there's something satisfying about getting a good result when you're working with a live subject...Nadia will be the first to admit that she's very particular about how she looks...so to have her happy with some photos from our session is gratifying to say the least.



Clever lissyssil and I fashioned a backdrop "stand" of sorts, and I bought a few panels of material to start with. I'm happy. Granted, I've still had to digitally manipulate the backdrop so it fills the screen, but at least there's something to work with! Note: need more material!

Also, idioglossia has inspired me to to purchase some inexpensive, but effective lighting.

This is fun!

Thanks to Nadia for allowing me to manipulate her best judgement. I'm very happy with the first result of our photo shoot:

Dear Theresa,

Your online application and support materials have been reviewed and CONGRATULATIONS! You have been accepted to Art in the Park 2008!!

The address for the space you have chosen is: 6 North Pathway.



WOOT!
Let the excitement begin.

I am excited for a photo shoot I'm doing with a friend today. I've finally coerced her into being my model. Let's hope the photos turn out as well as they look in my head!

Oh...she asked that I give her a cake for her troubles. I ordered this fantastic Fairytopia cake from Loblaws and can't wait to give it to her (I hope she shares!). It's pink and covered in flowers and this big plastic fairy barbie in the center. Awesome.

In other news...I'm a bit discouraged not to have heard from Art in the Park yet - they did write to ask me to define "multiples", which I've done, and haven't had a response yet. Eeps.

Fingers crossed.

Hi all,
I am writing to beseech you all to go look at these photos:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/treekins/sets/72157603888347226/
and choose your five favorite. Email, post a comment, or send me a message through Flickr to tell me what you think.
I'm hoping to do my first show in June, and I've got to choose 5 photos to send in, and QUICK, so I need your help! Vote, vote, vote!
I'll post the results ASAP.
Thank you!
I love you!
Oh, WOW, you look so awesome today. Wicked cool!


(thank you!)



(go look!)

I posted a couple of artsy photos of my feet/legs yesterday, and shortly received this:

Hello I must say to you that you have the most beautiful feet that I have see in my life. Thank you for your Photos and for your album.
Pardon for this message and for my English who is very bad. I am a Spanish slave, in this moment I don’t have Mistress, It is a dream for me to be able to get to be your servant, your maid, your butler, your houseboy, your cleaner house, and your slave. I have 5 years of experience in the submission and the servitude to a Mistress and her partner, I had been her maid, her servant and the her partner’s servant from 5 years ago.
It is a dream for me to be able to be your servant your real slave a live in slave. I always have wanted to be able to manage to be a slave 24/7,It is a dream to be able to your slave and be able to belong to you, to your feet my Princess
If you wish to have vacations/holidays in Spain in a house on the beach, you have here your house and a slave 24 hours to the day to your service.

At your feet always

Slave Alex

Hmmmmm. Food for thought, Alex. Food for thought.

Hello.
I am sick.
No no, don't worry. I'm not going to whine and complain this time.
I just wantd to tell you that I'm going to make an effort to think more positively. I'm writing it here so I can remember. And see it. It's going to be an effort, but I figure I have two choice right now:
1) wallow
2) look for the silver lining
3) throw up
Choice number three just popped in there. I'm not talking about just being sick right now, though; I'm talking about life in general. I am going to go with Option #2.

...and for today, maybe a little bit of #3, but that's niether here nor there.

Life has worn me down a bit again, I'm afraid.
Barf always does this to me. Phobias are awful, eh? And when you're faced with one, it sort of dwindles your hope a bit.

I feel sad today, so I'm going to write about it.

I feel sad because Caleb is still sick. He was up four times last night, running to the bathroom. I lay awake, thinking about all the work I've missed and will have to miss still. Thinking about my boss, who is hard on me sometimes. Often, really, and whom I know is disappointed in my absences. I thought about poor Caleb in the bathroom (who I often went to check on, of course). I thought about how bone-tired I am. Every muscle sags under the weight of my fatigue; every bone aches. I thought about how emotionally tired I am; how drained I am spiritually. I still have some juice left...but the extent of this depletion I feel...is discouraging.

I feel sad that my mother found some lumps under her ribs and didn't tell me about it. It's okay - turns out she has to start taking new medication to help her liver flush bad cholestorol. The best result that couldn've been, I guess! But she didn't tell me until afterward. She went through it alone.

I feel sad that I've lost a soul-mate: my sister. When Jen was born, I remember feeling like I had finally been completed. Jen and I have been soul twins - opposites - friends and enemies - forever. I love her with an ache in my gut. I cannot, for the life of me, understand her, please her, or give her what she needs and nor can she, for me. Right now, we aren't even speaking. But I keep up with her LiveJournal just so I can know she's surviving this hard life, and so I can see photos of my gorgeous niece and nephew. And Jen had a miscarriage. Jen recently miscarried what would have been her third baby. And I didn't even know. It breaks my heart.

I feel sad that my brother is going through a WONDERFUL time in his life and I haven't been able to share even that with him, because of how busy and sick I've been. I haven't met the girlfriend who has come into his life and brightened it. He's moving in with her late Spring. And somehow, I haven't met her. I love her already because of what she means to my dear brother. But I've never looked into her face. Smiled at her. Touched her hand and thanked her. Welcomed her.

I'm sad because I haven't talked to my father in over a year, except for the occasional email. I haven't heard his cherished voice since Christmas 2006. I don't know if he realizes how much I love him, and how sorely I miss him. I'm sad because my father lives in a storm of alternating mania and depression...but mostly in depression. And that's awful, because he is a marvellous soul and a beautiful man. And I cannot help him. I don't know how he feels today. I don't know what he feels. I don't know.

I'm sad because I don't feel like I appreciate the things I have enough. My Liam is learning to talk. He's changing so much! Last week when we got him from Jim, Mark looked at me, astonished, and said, "Tree, he's BIGGER." He was right. Oh. Liam's favorite new thing to say is, "Mama! LOOK!" He shows me the tv and books and his hands. The window, the papers on the couch, his brothers. I look, and say, "oh yeah!" But I wish I could really, really SEE.

I'm sad because Aidan is sick now. He alternately hovers threateningly over the toilet and unceremoniously marches down the stairs to watch tv. His cherub face is pale.

I'm sad because I feel overwhelmed. I think the only thing to do is to keep going, you know? I mean, what else is there? But I feel so tired. And I don't know if I'm doing this right. ANY of it.

If my mom had reached out. If my sister had. Would I have been there for them? Would I have comforted them? If my brother decides it's NOT okay that he doesn't see me much...would I lose him, too? Would I fail him?

I feel sad because I love Mark, and I don't think I'm doing that right, either.

What is love in the face of all this sadness?